"Religion should never be used to justify discrimination or justify hatred against anyone."

"Why do you not judge for yourselves what is right?" (Luke 12:57 NRSV).

News:  Be sure to see the work the UCC is doing with ONA and why it is important.

Can you be gay and a Christian?  This can be an emotionally charged issue and sadly has proven to be so in many churches. Yet, we now know that not only is it possible, but being gay and being a Christian is very compatible. It is indeed sad that so many gays do not know this message of love and instead go through life thinking that God hates them as they hopelessly try to deny who they are or worse, try to change. But this is not why God created us and he does not expect us to live in fear. Nor are we to merely be tolerated but instead we must live our lives completely and fully experience the love God has given us.

Unfortunately, much of the intolerance of gays comes from well intentioned  people of faith. So often it is the otherwise very loving Christians (or Jews... See Letter to Dr. Laura Schlessinger and Letter to Jerry Falwell from Biship Spong ) that somehow can not see how much we gays need their love. As we have seen in the reaction to the Matthew Shepard beating and countless other incidents, some of the religious extremists have actually had  the unintended effect of  encouraging others to hate and not love. Incredible as it may seem, even following the horrific attacks on the Pentagon and the World Trade towers, Falwell and Robertson joined together to point the finger of blame at among others, gays and lesbians. It seems almost unbelievable that such inflammatory and diverse rhetoric would continue at a time when all the rest of America is pulling together. This abuse from the religious right is usually based on the bible and anyone that has faced these people know how painful this can be. There is even a discussion on being abused by the bible at Steps To Recovery From Bible Abuse.  However, there is also some hope, in the aftermath of this brutal incident, that it has sparked open and honest discussions in many churches and amongst Christians in general.  It is our hope that this site will help all to better understand what gay is and what gay isn't and also to enlighten those that are still misinformed. We will do this by encouraging understanding and openness in hopes that all will come to know Christ's message.

Christ's message of love and tolerance is quite clear. "This is my commandment, that you love each other as I have loved thee" --John 15: 12.  As gays we are capable of the same love of God, of family, of friends as anyone else. We also have a need to express a special human love to those of the same sex. We need to live and love with the sexuality that God has given us.  How ironic it is that gays are the ones that have to, and are willing to, risk hatred and condemnation by others in order that they may express the love that they feel. The love that God has given them. With the hatred and attacks from so many sources, you would think that gays would stay locked away in the closet. Yet, they risk all to declare there love, to live in honesty and openness. What better way to show the conviction of their love and their willingness to follow Christ?  How can anyone call themselves Christian if they can not follow this simplest precept laid down by our Lord?

What does the Bible really say about homosexuality? Not very much actually and Jesus said nothing about it at all. Why then when the Bible says so little on this subject and does so unclearly, has it become such emotional issue in the church? Perhaps it is just fear of the unknown or of those that are different. For some, it is simply a political motivation. For others, it is based on all they have ever know and the awful silence that lets the fears and condemnation of the past continue from generation to generation. There are certainly other issues in the Bible that are addressed quit clearly and do not receive nearly the same attention. It is also very important to remember that the Bible does not actually address homosexuality at all but rather homosexual acts that were being performed by heterosexuals and acts not based in love at all but rather wanton lust which should be condemned by Christians. In fact, it seems that the Bible does value same sex love. While not gay, there are several examples of same sex 'love' such as David's love for Jonathan and Ruth's relationship with Naomi, and even Jesus and his disciples, especially the disciple John.  We are not calling any of these people gay, but people free enough to express their deep love for people of the same sex.

Theologians and ordinary lay people around  the world have studied the Biblical texts most often used to condemn Gay and Lesbian people . And what they have discovered is this: Those texts (Bible verses) have been taken out of context, "mistakenly" translated, or deliberately twisted to say something the original writers never intended! There is a lot of scripture that is quoted on both sides of this discussion and the Bible is always being interpreted to justify one's point of view. It will continue to be studied and the discussions of just how each word is to be interpreted  will go on and on Yet, as much as the scriptures are interpreted and studied, there is one overwhelming and clear message that is not open to interpretation. That is the message of love. If you are interested in learning more about specific bible passages and how they relate to the issue of homosexuality, "Biblical Perspectives on Homosexuality" by Walter Wink provides an excellent resource.

What was Jesus' Attitude?  In the Gospels, Jesus really has nothing to say about homosexuality at all so we can only assume that it was not seen as the same threat to Christianity as many see it today. What Christ often did speak out on was the hypocrisy and injustice he saw in the church. Sound familiar?

As we get to the point in our lives where we can finally reconcile being gay with our Christian faith, we find that we want to share our feeling and our stories in the hope that we might help others who are still struggling with how they feel. We hope that other gays and those still not sure will find comfort in our words and we also speak to all those that still do not understand us in a hope that they too will be better informed. We announce to the world that we too are God's children and we share fully in his love. "...whosoever believeth in him shall not perish, but have everlasting life." -- John 3:16

We know that God's love transcends all and is freely given to all believers regardless of nationality, race, sex, handicaps, age, or sexual orientation. We are at peace with our God given sexuality. We are free in Christ and no longer suffer from unhealthy guilt or shame because of being gay. Each of us is as God created us. God made us as we are, attracted to members of our own sex, and God does NOT make mistakes. We are gay  for a reason, and that reason is known but to God.

"Jesus makes it perfectly clear. God is not waiting in the padded pews of mega-churches that turn lesbians and gays into outcasts. God is out there in the world struggling to relieve the suffering of all Her oppressed and forgotten children." --Mel White

Guilt and Shame are things that many gays self inflict leading to low self-esteem depression and even self-hatred. Many gays go through life thinking they have been condemned by God when in reality it is not God at all but society or even ourselves that have done this. And when we feel ashamed, we are unable to face God, to really know God. The simple truth is... "There is therefore now, no condemnation for those that are in Christ Jesus." Romans 8:1. Do not be ashamed of who you are. God already knows you perfectly.

It is love not sex that we are talking about here. Being a christian and being gay means that you are a follower of Christ and that you have the need to fall in love with someone of the same sex.  I am not talking about others that may be engaged in lustful activities and those that use others for their wanton sexual desires. No, quite the contrary, I propose that this kind of behavior and being a Christian is not compatible and should be condemned for its selfish motives. This has nothing to do with being gay and should be rejected when engaged in by gays or straights. It is unfortunate and ironic that because of the shame and fear that so many gays face as they live in their little prisons, that they feel there only outlet for the burning need for another person of the same sex is in brief hidden encounters.  No, what we're talking about here is love, real love, expressed with honesty and openness and with commitment before God. This is surly what God has intended for his children and as such is beautiful and fulfilling. So it really has nothing to do with being homosexual or heterosexual, what is a sin is any destructive use of sex or that which is outside of a committed loving relationship. Yes, it is love that is at the core of being a Christian and one can only wonder how the anti-gay Christians are able to justify their attitudes. So, why is it that the way gays conduct their lives is so much more important than what can clearly be seen as sin and has nothing to do with being  gay and straight?

You know, just as with this gay issue, there will always be people trying to tell you how you should act to be a Christian. How you should got to church, pray, read the Bible, treat others and in general live your life. Yet all these things do not ensure you are a Christian. It's really quite simple... Being a Christian is not what you do but who you are.  Who you are will determine what you do.

So...  can you be gay and a Christian?  It is not only possible but we accept being gay as a blessing.  In our quest to understand just who we are and why we are the way we are, we have found that we have truly been reborn and have a deeper faith and know God better than ever before. Thank God we are just as we are. Coming out and accepting that you are gay is a central expression of who you are. It is exactly this freedom to express from your inner self that will, at long last, let you also express your faith from deep within.

There are so many great references available on the internet on this subject. (We have included just a few below) We encourage you to go out with open mind and become enlightened. We thank all those that have taken so much time to make so much information available. Much of what we have said here has been influenced by others and we gratefully  thank them for their words.

I guess I have moved beyond the theological arguments about homosexuality and now because of my close relationship with God, I simply know in my heart that I am doing what is right. Where once was doubt and fear of sinning, there is now love and a great sense of peace.

The bottom line...  This is a truly wonderful and exciting time for gays that have come to know Christ. While lots has been happening in the area of recognition and even benefits for domestic partners, the big news is that more and more churches are welcoming gays. Surely there is still much to do but now, gays can lead Christ centered lives and do so with other Christians.

See what's happening with ONA. (United CHurch of Christ)

"Spirit"

Within each one there lies in wait
the Love and beauty God has placed.
And held so deep that some can't see
this Spirit yearns for us to free.

But when it stirs and starts to flow
with open heart and child like faith.
We give this Love, we let it go
and through it's giving feel it grow.

Within our hearts this Spirit dwells
we feel this Love that in us swells.
So blessed are those that let it out
and touch the lives of those about.
                -- Jim

Some bumper stickers...
 

God forgives...                  Let Him

The Christian right is neither

Some inspirational stories...

The Burning Hut:

The only survivor of a shipwreck, washed up on a small, uninhabited island. He prayed feverishly for God to rescue him, and every day he scanned the horizon for help, but none seemed forthcoming. Exhausted, he eventually managed to build a little hut out of driftwood to protect him from the elements, and to store his few possessions.

But then one day, after scavenging for food, he arrived home to find his little hut in flames, the smoke rolling up to the sky. The worst had happened; everything was lost. He was stung with grief and anger. God, how could you do this to me he cried. Early the next day, however, he was awakened by the sound of a ship that was approaching the island. It had come to rescue him. How did you know I was here? asked the weary man of his rescuers. We saw your smoke signal they replied.

It is easy to get discouraged when things are going badly. But we shouldn't lose heart, because God is at work in our lives, even in the midst of pain and suffering. Paul wrote, ..I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want (Philippines 4:12). Paul had confidence that good would come out of everything (Romans 8:28), so he learned to be thankful, not bitter, even when he was suffering. Who knows? Remember next time your little hut is burning to the ground - - it just may be a smoke signal that summons the grace of God.
 

The Cross Room:

The young man was at the end of his rope. Seeing no way out, he dropped to his knees in prayer. "Lord, I can't go on," he said. "I have too heavy a cross to bear." The Lord replied, "My son, if you can't bear its weight, just place your cross inside this room. Then, open that other door, and pick out any cross you wish."

The man was filled with relief. "Thank you, Lord," he sighed, and he did as he was told. Upon entering the other door, he saw many crosses, some so large the tops were not visible. Then, he spotted a tiny cross leaning against a far wall. "I'd like that one, Lord," he whispered. And the Lord replied, "My son, that is the cross you just brought in."
 

Touching a life:

One day, when I was a freshman in high  school, I saw a kid from my class was walking home from school.
 His  name was Kyle.  It looked like he was carrying all of his books.  I thought to myself, "Why would anyone bring home all his books on a Friday?  He must really be a nerd."   I had quite a weekend planned (parties and a football game with my friend tomorrow afternoon), so I shrugged my shoulders and went on. As I was walking, I saw a bunch of kids running toward him. They ran at him, knocking all his books out of his arms and tripping him so he landed in the dirt.  His glasses went flying, and I saw them land in the grass about ten feet from him.  He looked up and I saw this terrible sadness in his eyes.  My heart went out to him.   So, I jogged over to him and as he crawled around looking for his glasses, I saw a tear in his eye. As I handed him his glasses, I said, "Those guys are jerks.  They really should get lives." He looked at me and said, "Hey thanks!"  There was a big smile on his face. It was one of  those smiles that showed real gratitude.  I helped him pick up his books, and asked him where he lived.  As it turned out, he lived near me, so I asked  him why I had never seen him before.  He said he had gone to private school before now.  I would have never hung out with a private school kid before. We talked all the way home, and I carried his books.  He turned out to be a pretty cool kid.  I asked him if he wanted to play football on Saturday with me and my friends.  He said yes.  We hung all weekend and the more I got to know Kyle, the more I liked him. And my friends thought the same of him.  Monday morning came, and there was Kyle with the huge stack of books again.  I stopped him and said, "Damn boy, you are gonna really build some serious muscles with this pile of books everyday!" He just laughed and handed me half the books.

Over the next four years, Kyle and I became best friends.  When we were seniors, we began to think about college.  Kyle decided on Georgetown, and I was going to Duke.  I knew that we would always be friends, that the miles would never be a problem.  He was going to be a doctor, and I was going for business on a football scholarship. Kyle was valedictorian of our class.  I teased him all the time about being a nerd.  He had to prepare a speech for Graduation.  I was so glad it wasn't me having to get up there and speak. Graduation day, I saw Kyle.  He looked great.  He was one of those guys that really found himself during high school.  He filled out and actually looked good in glasses.  He had more dates than me and all the girls loved him! Boy, sometimes I was jealous.  Today was one of those days.  I could see that he was nervous about his speech. So, I smacked him on the back and said,  "Hey, big guy, you'll be great!" He looked at me with one of those looks (the really grateful one) and smiled. "Thanks," he said. As he started his speech, he cleared his throat, and began.  "Graduation is a time to thank those who helped you make it through those tough years.  Your parents, your teachers,  your siblings, maybe a coach... but mostly your friends.  I am here to tell all of you that being a friend to someone is the best gift you can give them. I am going to tell you a story." I just looked at my friend with disbelief as he told the story of the first day we met.  He had planned to kill himself over the weekend.  He talked of how he had cleaned out his locker so his Mom wouldn't have to do it later and was carrying his stuff home. He looked hard at me and gave me a little smile. "Thankfully, I was saved. My friend saved me from doing the unspeakable." I heard the gasp go through the crowd as this handsome, popular boy told us all about his weakest moment.  I saw his Mom and dad looking at me and smiling that same grateful smile. Not until that moment did I realize it's depth. Never underestimate the power of your actions.  With one small gesture you can change a person's life.  For better or for worse.  God puts us all in each other's lives to impact one another in some way.  Look for God in others.
 

 Ice Cream for the Soul:
Last week I took my children to a restaurant. My six-year-old son asked if he could say grace.  As we bowed our heads he said,  "God is good.  God is great. Thank you for the food, and I would even thank you more if mom gets us ice cream for dessert.  And Liberty and justice for all!  Amen!" Along with the laughter from the other customers nearby I heard a woman remark, "That's  what's wrong with  this country.  Kids today don't even know how to pray. Asking God for  ice-cream!   Why, I  never!" Hearing  this, my son burst into tears and asked me, "Did I do it wrong?  Is God mad at me?" As I held him and assured him that he had done a terrific job and God was certainly not mad at him, an elderly gentleman approached the table.  He winked at my son and said, "I happen to know that God thought that was a great prayer."   "Really?" my son asked.  "Cross my heart." said the gentleman. Then in a  theatrical whisper he added (indicating the woman whose remark had started this whole thing),  "Too bad she never asks God for ice cream.   A little ice cream is good for the soul sometimes."  Naturally, I bought my kids ice cream at the end of the meal. My son stared at his for a moment and then did something I will remember the rest of my life.  He picked up his sundae and without a word walked over and placed it in front of the woman  With a big smile he told her, "Here, this is for you.  Ice cream is good  for the soul sometimes, and my soul is good already."
 
 

 Note: If you have a favorite inspirational story you would like to share, please send them to us and we would be glad to add them. email us
 

Some Helpful Links

Christianity and Homosexuality	This is a good general Discussion and references to the bible
Letter to Jerry Falwell	Bishop Spong writes an open letter to Jerry Falwell
Soulforce	A friendly Network of nonviolence seeking justice for GLBT  (Mel White)
NH Coalition for LGBT Concerns May Event	If you live in New Hampshire, check this out!!
Cathedral of Hope	A fantastic Ministry for GLBT people  (Rev Michael Piazza) A huge collection of sermons and other resurces
Why I changed my mind	Article by The Rev. Geoffrey Knowlton Pastor of an Open and Affirming Church in NH.
Biblical Perspective on Homosexuality	A excellent bible study by Walter Wink
Are there Gay People in the Bible?	The Bible story of David and Jonathan
A Gay Christian Place	a gathering spot for gay, lesbian, bisexual and  transgendered Christians who are looking for fellowship, support and a place to celebrate   or explore faith in Jesus Christ
Gay Christian Online	Ben has done an extensive job with his web site but a bit slow to load.
The Gay Christian Connection	A good meeting and sharing place for Christians
Whosoever	A wonderful online Magazine for Gay Christians, a source of inspiration
Letter to Dr Laura	An open letter to Dr Laura Schlessinger showing the absurdity of her position on Gays
John3:16	A moving and inspiring animation and some Christian links
Steps To Recovery From Bible Abuse	Provides a very interesting view on the bible and how we are indeed abused by it in the hands of some

Updated 12-156-2004