50 Ways to Please Your Lover


This list was published in 'Instinct Magazine'...

With Valentine's Day on the way, we came up with a few creative, romantic, sexy, and, well, corny but sweet ideas for you that'll show your man how much he means to you...*

1.Cuddle with him.

2.Tell him to share a fantasy of his, then surprise him a week later by acting it out.

3.Cook him up a three-course meal and have it waiting on the table, with candles and flowers, when he gets home from work. Clean up and do the dishes afterwards yourself.

4.Do the laundry...yours and his.

5.Allow him to be experimental (meaning, when he comes back to the bedroom with kitchen appliances, some raw cookie dough and a smile, don't be judgmental).

6.Give him a full-body, hot-oil massage. Naked.

7.Feed him chocolate-covered strawberries in bed. Naked.

8.Get up early on Saturday morning and wash his car while he's still sleeping...then go for an
afternoon drive with him and make love in the back seat on a secluded road.

9.Call him up at work.

10.Encourage him to pursue his dreams. Support his career decisions. Go to his work-sponsored softball tournament. Cheer him on in the game of life.

11.Tie him up and tickle him with a feather, an ice cube, the cat...

12.Tell him, in more than two words, how special he is to you.

13.Go out to dinner and a movie on  a Saturday night.

14.Rent him his favorite video, make some popcorn and enjoy.

15.Tell him that extra weight he gained over the holidays makes him look more "manly."
And try your best to sound sincere.

16.Serve him breakfast in bed...and lunch...and dinner.

17.Don't tell him you're "ready for a commitment." Tell him you're already committed.

18.Rotate his tires and change his oil.

19.Carve his initials on the top of mushrooms and use them to garnish a nice salad.

20.Buy him that missing Barbra Streisand record, especially if you can't stand her.

21.Promise him that when he's around, you won't play your Barbra Streisand records.

22.Go for a quiet walk on a beach holding hands

23.Massage his tired feet when he comes home

24.Don't tell his mother that he's the one who does the "woman" things.

25.Arrange a mystery weekend for no reason other than to vary the routine. Rent a hotel
room in your own city and make reservations at a romantic restaurant and tell him to pack
appropriately and be ready when you pick him up after work on Friday. If you can afford
it, book a surprise weekend trip to a romantic destination: the Chateau Frontenac in
Quebec City, San Francisco, Palm Springs, Hawaii, a spa, a Caribbean Island, London or
Paris. Only tell him how to pack and when to be ready to be picked up for a surprise.

26.Buy him all five, er, four (oh how we miss the old days) Spice Girls On-Tour Action Figures so the  two of you can play "war" with your Barbie collection.

27.Call him early in the day and make an appointment with him to meet at home or a nearby
hotel for a lunch-time sex date.

28.Get in the shower with all your clothes on and when you get out, sing to him "My Heart Will Go On" off-key at the top of your lungs. He will think this is funny.

29.If you're going out of town, leave Post-It notes with sweet little messages for him on the
toothpaste tube, his coffee cup, in his underwear drawer, etc. so he'll think of you while
you're gone.

30.Read fun books to each other at night-and do all the voices.

31.Give him one uninterrupted block of time alone-nobody needs their beloved in their face
all the time. In fact, after he's been alone for awhile he'll probably give you a big smooch
on your face when he sees you again, maybe even more than a smooch.

32.Let him play that Celine Dion CD the next time you take a long drive, even though it makes you cringe. When he looks at you with that hopeful, puppy-dog look, smile sweetly and assure him that, yes, Celine does, in fact, have a beautiful voice. And no, her nose is not too big, either.

33.Mail him an "I love you" card, even though you live together.

34.Give him back to his wife.

35.Have that protein shake waiting for him when he gets home from the gym-and don't skimp on the fresh strawberries.

36.Tell him everything you're thinking.

37.Don't tell him everything you're thinking.

38.Sit him down by a warm fire and serve him up a dry martini (and don't use Duraflames!).

39.Buy him flowers, just because.

40.Role play: You're the strict, stern, too-studly high school history teacher and he's the unruly, always-tardy, "I forgot my homework...again" student. Keep him after class. Find creative ways to "discipline" him.

41.Wake him up with a 'something special'.

42.Give him a day where he's in charge. Allow him to make all the decisions. Whatever he says the two of you are going to do, do it...including in the bedroom (especially in the bedroom).

43.Let him get in touch with his inner child every so often.

44.Run him a hot bath. Put on some classical music. Light a few candles. Strip him naked and put him in the tub. Wash his feet, his hands and his hair. Massage his scalp. Scrub his back. If he does so, shave his chest for him. Let him soak for awhile while you pamper and clean him. When he's done, towel him off and rub lotion all over him. Then tuck him into bed and kiss him.

45.If the two of you are out shopping and he sees something he really likes but doesn't buy,
go back later that day or the next day and get it for him.

46.If he's always wanted to go skydiving, hang gliding, bungee jumping, whatever, sign him up for a lesson and/or a session. Tell him how much you're looking forward to seeing him in that tight, sexy flight suit.

47.Make your own dirty movie and let him be the star.

48.Don't work on weekends.

49.Know his erogenous zones...and exploit them.

50.Kiss him whenever and wherever you can.

                  (*) all of which are guaranteed to get you some heart-shaped lovin'