Feb 19-22, 2004

Los Padres Nat’l Forest & Santa Monica Mtns, Ventura County, CA

A JABOY* Lunacy Too Idiotic to Miss

Back by dysfunctional demand, Coyote FourPlay has been resurrected and ready to shovel out loads of s***, er, entertainment for you.  But, wait: YOU are the entertainment!!    As we did last year, the event will be preceded by an informal, two day scrub run (Tue & Wed, 2/17-18) of the Backbone Trail from Santa Monica to Pt Mugu State Park (a fat 100K total) followed by our standard fare C4P (7, 50, 40 & 32 miles).  For the die-hards this is about 195 miles in 6 days (hell, just round up to 200?…., we can arrange that!!)  We also have options on each day for fewer, gentler miles for those who want to spend time taking in the spectacular views, the signs of spring and the impending aid station cutoffs.   

OK, you ask: “How can I possibly handle all this?”  It’s easy: (1) first, send me the entry fee of  $196.00 (less than last year cuz we got some pate left over); (2) complete the incriminating application below, including the demand for artistic expression; and (3) send it all in with postmark not later than Jan 6^th.  Entries received after that date run the risk of not getting full complement of apparel, without reduction in entry fee.   For your dollar investment, you’ll receive three very fine pieces of apparel (2 Patagonia’s & 1 Bowling Shirt); 3 dinners and a picnic for the formal C4P days; other normal hospitality of the better ultras and our renowned, unparalleled aid station fare (that venison sausage was great last year!!); our normal complement of goofy prizes; and some special entertainment you won’t find at any other ultra (hint: you get to be a part of it).   If you already have an official C4P bowling shirt, yes, you can wear that and save 30 bucks.  However, many of you have worn your bowling shirt while practicing to improve your game (except you Canadics) on the off chance that C4P would be back.   So, another color would look great in your wardrobe and at our and other State dinners.  Finally, a one-shirt option will save you 75 bucks.  With such high quality goodies from Patagonia, you’ll regret not going for the full monty (ooooh, skin?).

 There will be a Program laying out event logistics, to be distributed sometime near the end of January.  As in the past, however, much communication will be done thru e-mails beforehand (like, where to stay, etc).  If you’re new to this event and/or need to do some research on the event before shelling out that chunk of cash, visit www.vhtrc.org/fourplay; if that doesn’t convince you, be foolish enough to let me coerce you into it.  Ignorance ain’t bliss in this situation, so don’t punish yourself and us unnecessarily.  Send your entry, and payable, to Howard Cohen, 4573 Via Grande, Newbury Park, CA 91320. E-mail gravityh@adelphia.net 

* Just A Bunch Of Yahoos includes Mike Turon, Bill Kee, Howard Cohen (HA**), Sook Gumpel, Maria Calvert and Chris Scott (AA**) – plus a host of very patient friends who help host this trail butchery experience

**********************************************************************************************************************************

 Real- and Nick-Name____________________________________           DOB & Age on 2/19  ________________           

 Address/City/State/Zip_____________________________________  Scrub Run?   Yes (1) (2),   No,   Maybe

 E-Mail Address____________________________________   Phone_Daytime_________Night Time________ 

 Describe your tan and hair shaving lines  _______________________________________________________

 Newbie List: _____________________________________________________________________

 Sizeè Shirt:   S    M    L   XL               Jacket (Unisex):   S    M     L    XL                    Shoe ____ 

Bowling high score _________when __________

 # Add’l Meals:  Thursday (@ $15) ____   Friday (@ $15) _____ Saturday (@ $15) _____   Sunday (@ $6) ____

 Total Amount enclosed with this entry (Entry & Additional Meals):                                         

    ** If you need to save some bucks, do the math as noted above:  

you’ll get the T; BUT NOT THE 2 APPAREL ITEMS ($135)                        $___________

you’ll get 2 apparel items; BUT NOT THE BOWLING SHIRT($166)            $___________

you’ll get 3 apparel items; THE FULL MONTY ($196)                                $___________

 Additional Meals                                                                                   $___________

Total   payable, to  Howard Cohen,                                                           $___________

WAIVER

 (Of course this is small print.  Read it anyway….)  In consideration of my participation in this event, I, intending to be legally bound, do hereby for myself, my heirs, executors and administrators, and any other bozo dippy enough to think s/he should get a piece of the action, waive and release forever any and all rights and claims of damage I may accrue (read, do unto myself) against any and all sponsors of this event, the Virginia Happy Trails Running Club, its administrators and volunteers, the head armadildo** (I meant armadillo!!) and his ass-a-dildo**, the California Department of Parks and Recreation, the USDA Forest Service, and assigns and signs and protest placards from any and all injuries suffered by me while traveling to or from or while participating in this event.   I attest that I am physically fit but have no clue what 190 miles in one week’s training feels like (so I’ll probably run shorter; but should I try to run the whole thing, it’s my own damn fault), and I promise not to blame the event management for what I could have foreseen.  If I fall down-go boom, or suffer any other such calamity worthy of medical attention, I’m responsible for dragging my own butt to see a doctor.  To participate, I accept all rules and conditions, and will comply with them, regardless how inane (after all, this is C4P…).  I grant permission to use any photographs or other recordings depicting my participation in this event for any (as yet ill-defined) legitimate purpose.  As a part of this waiver, I acknowledge that I have read and understood all of the above.  I also recognize that sometime during the weekend, I should shmooze one or all of the JABOYs to gain their favor, in hopes I’ll win one of their really spiffy awards.  I also expect not wear clothes of the opposite sex, but may change my mind on the trail.

        ________________________________________________________________________________________

            Sign and Date  (If under 18, you can’t participate.  This is only for adult ninnies, not juvenile ones))

 Use the back of your entry (that would be the space below, which, if you cut this App in half to send in only the critical demographic info above, and save the logistics crap for later reading (cuz your memory isn’t quite what it used to be), the space below will be “free”….(unless, of course, you’re also well into electronic media, in which case you’ve just saved your App onto your desktop and regret having to actually waste time and resources printing off the App to snail-mail in, much less having…)) to doodle or create another form of obnoxiously relevant humor.  As in other years, your chances of winning something valuable for this contribution exceed those you might otherwise gain for your running performance.